{"id":279,"date":"2019-09-15T17:38:16","date_gmt":"2019-09-15T22:38:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/dashiellbarkhuss.com\/discomfortblog\/?p=279"},"modified":"2019-09-15T17:39:01","modified_gmt":"2019-09-15T22:39:01","slug":"day-21-ask-strangers-to-play-paper-scissors-rock","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/dashiellbarkhuss.com\/discomfortblog\/day-21-ask-strangers-to-play-paper-scissors-rock\/","title":{"rendered":"Day 21: Ask Strangers To Play Paper Scissors Rock"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>For this challenge, I asked fellow patrons at the grocery store to play paper scissors rock. As an added bonus, whoever wins had to buy something for the other person.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">What Happened<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Two out of the four interactions were successful. But the other two were dreadful!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>This was the first time a challenge was <em>more<\/em> difficult than I expected. I thought people would be fine playing with me. Instead, the first two interactions were rife with awkwardness, desperation, and piercing tension.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I later realized, this was in part due to the old conference badge I was wearing. I wore it to hold my phone to record the interaction. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The first man eyed the badge suspiciously. I thought he was on to my phone recording. But, during the next interaction the lady asked me what group I belonged to, gesturing to my badge. That&#8217;s when I realized, clad with my badge I looked like a cult member.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/dashiellbarkhuss.com\/discomfortblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/IMG_5102-565x1024.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-285\" width=\"304\" height=\"551\" srcset=\"http:\/\/dashiellbarkhuss.com\/discomfortblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/IMG_5102-565x1024.jpg 565w, http:\/\/dashiellbarkhuss.com\/discomfortblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/IMG_5102-165x300.jpg 165w, http:\/\/dashiellbarkhuss.com\/discomfortblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/IMG_5102-768x1392.jpg 768w, http:\/\/dashiellbarkhuss.com\/discomfortblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/IMG_5102.jpg 770w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 304px) 100vw, 304px\" \/><figcaption>Badge holding my phone<\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>After I took the card out of the badge, the interactions went fine! Even with my phone still recording in the badge holder.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here&#8217;s two of the interactions, the worst and the best:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed-youtube wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-embed-aspect-16-9 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Challeneg 21: Ask Strangers to Play Paper Scissors Rock\" width=\"688\" height=\"387\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/dnvEBAnGIkk?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Proof Is In The Recording<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>I&#8217;m glad I recorded the interactions. As cringeworthy as it was to re-watch an embarrassing moment, I learned a lot from watching the recordings back. I could see where I could&#8217;ve handled the interaction better. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, in response to the couple&#8217;s suspicion of me, I tensed up. If I calmed down, it could have in turn calmed them down. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Seeing where I messed up gave me hope. It wasn&#8217;t just that this couple was crazy, I <em>made<\/em> the situation worse. I had control.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>It sucks to feel I did a bad job. But in the grand scheme of things, it&#8217;s actually empowering to know I messed up. It shows me that if I made different choices, I could get to a better outcome.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I found another surprising benefit to recording my challenge. For hours, my mind replayed what happened. I thought over and over again about how these people must hate me, how I messed up, how people are so weird, how I&#8217;ll never be anything because I&#8217;m so lame and I can&#8217;t handle people. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>After hours of ruminating, I reluctantly watched the video. To my surprise, it wasn&#8217;t as bad as I thought. Having a copy of the truth brought me back to reality.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">What I Learned<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>With other challenges, I saw how fear can cause undue stress. But for this challenge I saw the opposite extreme. Going in with too many good expectations can leave you shaken when something goes wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When other people get reactive, it&#8217;s important to stay calm. Think about how you can explain the situation better so they can understand you and let their guard down. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I&#8217;m interested in recording more of my life. I think this might be a secret trick to gaining insights and self awareness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Join The Challenge<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>For more information on the challenge, see the&nbsp;<a href=\"http:\/\/dashiellbarkhuss.com\/30daysofdiscomfort.html\">30DaysOfDiscomfort challenge page<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Want to interact with other participants of the challenge? Join the<a href=\"https:\/\/discordapp.com\/invite\/ESuNPNS\">&nbsp;Discord chat group<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Share your experiences on twitter with the hashtag&nbsp;<strong>#30DaysOfDiscomfort<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>For this challenge, I asked fellow patrons at the grocery store to play paper scissors rock. As an added bonus,&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-279","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v25.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Day 21: Ask Strangers To Play Paper Scissors Rock - 100 Days of Discomfort<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"I asked strangers to play paper scissors rock with me. It didn&#039;t go as planned. 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